As February has been given the title ‘the month of love’ it seems that the topic of love and all that it encompasses seems to be everywhere- from commercials and TV shows, to ads and decorations. As Valentine’s Day drew near I started processing through the concept of love in a whole new light. Being married changes your perspective on certain things and I found myself redefining my understanding of love due to changes that had taken place in my own life.
The two Valentines celebrations that Ben and I shared before we were married were with others- we enjoyed conversation and Cheerwine over dinner. One year we dressed up and the next we stayed closer to home and went the more casual route. Regardless each one was special in its own way. This year was a bit unique in that Valentine’s Day was on a Friday night of a school week (last year Valentine’s Day fell during Chinese New Year break) and it was also the same day as the 100th Day of school along with a Chinese holiday- the annual Lantern festival. This meant that my time with my students on this day was going to be a bit crazy. I love holidays and enjoy celebrating them with my students, but trying to smush two in to one day is madness. I was up super late the night before putting treats together for my students and checking off a long ‘to do’ list to make sure I had everything I needed for the big day. Ben knew that the week was going to be crazy so he gave me his gifts on Wednesday and Thursday. It was great getting them early as I was able to enjoy them more than I probably would have in the chaos of Friday.
As of Friday afternoon we still didn’t have a plan for the evening and it wasn’t until we were walking out the door that a plan was made- eat somewhere close to home and then watch a movie. I was content with this choice- after all we were both exhausted from the week and the thought of getting all dressed up to go across town didn’t seem too exciting. That evening we were able to continue our tradition of drinking Cheerwine and shared stories of people that had meant a lot to us over the past year (both traditions we started our first V-day together :)
Despite my contentment at the time I couldn’t help fighting off feelings of sadness. We didn’t do anything exciting for Valentine’s Day- nothing like we had in the past. Sitting at dinner we barely spoke because we were too tired to process aloud- how boring were we I thought to myself.
It wasn’t until I stepped back from it all that I began to see how our Valentine’s Day wasn’t boring at all. We were able to enjoy cinnamon rolls (shaped into hearts) for breakfast, we were able to exchange treats along the way and actually saw each other for a few minutes during the day (which rarely happens), we were able to sit side by side and enjoy a Western meal together for dinner, we were able to share a Cheerwine (brought back from our travels last summer) and share together about people who had been a huge encouragement over the past year, we were able to watch a Chick flick (I at one point fell asleep, but woke up to Ben laughing hysterically at something that was taking place in the movie), and on and on I could go…
You see I think that Hollywood, the commercials, media in general makes you think that to have a successful Valentine’s Day you need to get all decked up, go the most expensive restaurant, exchange large and crazy gifts (don’t get me wrong… I don’t think these things are necessarily bad- we have enjoyed doing some of these ourselves in the past :), but I think what they forget to share is that love is more than just this day called Valentine’s Day. Love is sticking by a person when life gets hard, it is your husband helping clean the house when you are tired, it is going to the store to pick up groceries so the other person doesn’t have to, it is making sacrifices for the other person and putting them before yourself.
I have a lot to learn in the department of love. Reflecting through this day it was good to reminded that love does not come naturally to us folks here on earth. We need the daily help of our Heavenly Father to make it happen.
So for today- I am content… I am beyond blessed to have this man of God beside me and if all we do today is sit side by side to eat dinner and watch a cheesy movie then I can’t complain. Life is good…
